On my break

I teach 5 classes Monday - Friday mornings. The company I works for gives a 5 minute break in-between classes. It is sooo wonderful. I wrote down a list of some of the things I do during my short breaks. It's kinda funny to see how much you can do in just 5 minutes.

1. Check the weather.
2. Reapply lipstick.
3. Paint fingernails.
4. Yell at the kids to be quiet.
5. Start a load of laundry.
6. Text my Mom/Sister/Friend.
7. Record a Marco Polo message to a friend.
8. Untangle my headset.
9. Prepare props for my next lesson.
10. Rush to the fridge for water.
11. Gun to the bathroom.
12. Change my outfit.
13. Fix my hair.
14. Turn on PBS kids for Luke (he is an early riser)
15. Read my scriptures

Addressing the Elephant in the Room

There have been so many thoughts and feelings inside my heart the past couple of months. It's been difficult to fully express that range of emotions that happens when two people decide that they no longer should be married.

For the past several years we have made things work despite our vastly different beliefs regarding religion. But, with each passing year it has gotten harder and harder to agree on the most basic of things in regard to parenting. Earlier this year things got really difficult and with heavy hearts we made the decision to divorce. This week my mind keeps reverting to this quote by Abrahma Lincoln. He said; "A House Divided against itself cannot stand".

It has been a HUGE adjustment. Going from doing the same things I have been doing for 14 years and then within 45 days no longer have those same routines has been emotionally difficult. It's been the simple, every-day things that have been the hardest. Setting the table for just three instead of two, not having a set day for each load of laundry due to lack of demand, and not having funny work stories from Bran.

But, spiritually, it' has been the thing that needed to happen. Both of us were getting more and more stubborn in regards to religion and neither one of us were willing to budge. It's not his fault - it's not mine. It's just was.

I have been SO blessed thru this period of time. I have a great part-time job, and amazing support from Brandon. We are friendly and kind to each other and we are working this "new normal" out as a team.

I have often thought of what I could do to help someone thru the first few scary months of divorce. I have had so many excellent and amazing people reach out to me. Here are my thoughts:

1) Grocery store gift cards. Those first few month are financially scary - especially if you have split the finances and your divorce isn't final. That means you aren't getting child support or alimony and you are pulling your own financial weight. It is SO scary! When you look at the bank account and know that what is in there is all there is. Thankfully, the time it took for our paperwork and process to go through was quick.  It could have been much worse for me. Some friends have spent over a year in the process - that's sounds horrible and so stressful.

2) Send spiritual articles on a regular basis. They will be a lifeline and a help when the waves of regret, despair and self-loathing come. My favorite resources have been the Youtube Channel Don't Miss This, Mom Power summer sessions, The Chosen movie, and Ensign articles from a cherished friend. Plus, daily time in the Book of Mormon and Ensign/Conference talks of my own choosing. It has all been my life line.

3) Ask if there is anything you can help them replace. When Brandon moved out stuff went with him. Obviously, he needed to setup his own household and I don't resent that. But, I've come to realize that some of those things I really would eventually need. For instance, another water pitcher so we can have water and lemonade at the same time, more dinner plates so I'm not doing dishes every other day, that funnel set I thought I'd never used, and a DVD Player so we can borrow movies from Grandma/Grandpa and the library. I also eventually need a better solution to the mounds of books sitting on the floor. I'll get there though. I'm giving myself time to process the sadness of those bookshelves.

I hope that one day I will be in a financial situation that I can help someone else out financially who is going through a divorce. In the meantime, I'll be on the lookout for those people already around me who could use a bit of cheer and happiness from me. 

A BIG project finished

This is the final picture of the last set of blinds in my house that I cleaned. When Covid began I knew I wanted to take down each set of blinds and clean them. I just never thought it would take me 5 months to finish the project. 

Truthfully, they aren't difficult to do. It just takes a bit of motivation. I haul them out to the backyard, put some soap all over them, and scrub them up with a cloth. It takes me about 40 minutes to do a set. I have 13 sets in the house that are now officially complete. WAHOO! I think it would be a good annual project to do. Perhaps I'll always start around March. Now that I have a system down, I think it will be easier.

Burrston pond

Since we've been isolated at home our days get very monotonous and boring. On this particular Sunday I woke up wanting to go somewhere and do something. Since we aren't sure if we have Covid yet, I decided to take the boys down to Mona to scope out a pond I've heard about for a few years.

The online reviews said this was a fabulous place and it did not disappoint. There were so many cute ponds to explore. Since it was a Sunday it was a down and back drive. But,we did get out of the car and walk around a little bit. There were a few people camping there (which I don't think you are supposed to do) and even more people fishing and swimming. It is a delightful place and I hope we can go back in the fall. It takes about 30 minutes to get there from our house. The history of the place is very fascinating too.

4th of July

Today was such an amazing day! This was the first time that the boys left to go to Brandon's house for the entire weekend. I was determined not to have a pity party with lots of bawling while they were gone. So, I taught more classes then normal and my friends made it a priority to get me out of the house.

My sweet neighbor, Lisa, got me out of the house at 8am (before it got so HOT - Utah in July) and we picked up smoothies and drove down to the Payson temple. She knows this place has my soul and heart. We walked,talked, and laughed. Then, I took her past the house, and then down to Spring Lake. It was such a delight to talk, laugh, and cry with her. 

I then came home for a few hours and spent some time chillin' (taking a nap). It was just what I needed. Then, I zipped up to Draper to meet this dear friend - Erica. She and I go WAY back - like early teenage years. 

We met at the Draper City Park. This park is a great one. Plenty of play areas and shade trees. It was a bit on the breezy side as you can tell in this snap chap photo.

This is the most popular place in this park. This massive tree is called "The Tree of Life" It's so beautiful and offers so much shade. At Christmas time people come to the park to see the lights that have been spread across it's gigantic frame. Hopefully, I will make it a priority to take the boys to see it this next winter.

After spending a few hours in the shade talking we stopped by Leatherby's, which was just down the road for an early dinner. Yes, we did wear our masks until our food arrived. With the number of positive cases at 676 today I carry my mask with me and use it whenever I near others. 

The food here was absolutely amazing! I love that it tasted like food I would have prepared at home. Even the cheese on those fries tasted like the cheddar cheese I have in my fridge.  Sadly, I forgot to get a picture of my ice cream. It was equally amazing though. It had pralines and caramel sauce on top pf vanilla icecream with was served in a waffle bowl. I happily snarfed it all down.

This is a day I will always remember. It was amazing and just what I needed. Good friends help me realize the multitude of blessings that I have.